my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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