Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Why can't burritos get me drunk
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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