sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
