you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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