oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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