Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Randomize
