absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize