Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
