i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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