someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
