How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
