so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
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