Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
