Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
