so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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