I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
