He is an equal opportunity slut.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
