Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I came so hard my ears popped.
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