whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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