Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
