They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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