margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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