If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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