I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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