Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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