Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
