I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
