Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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