I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
