Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
