GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
