Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
