i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
