i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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