Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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