i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
