so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
