toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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