His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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