He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
