well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize