so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
