whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
How external is "for external use only"?
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
