how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Randomize
