Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize
