I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Randomize
