So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
either way he was missing a nipple.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
