this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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