I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
