Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Randomize
