I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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