So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
